Reader Requests: High Tea Party Theme

Alright. So there weren’t any jazz hands per say at the big musical program the other night, but there were definitely some rumba moves going on up there so somebody *coughMusicTeacher* has been watching herself a little Dancing with the Stars. So although there were no stars on stage (other than mini #1 that is!), it was a fun and fabulous night that we were sure to capture on camera for pure Rehearsal Dinner embarrassment in the future. A job well done, all around I’d say!

This morning I’m off to drop off the mini’s at preschool, stay for a little parent appreciation brunch in mini #2’s classroom, then meet up with my friend to go see the Southern Living Show House which is about a mile from my house. What’s really ridiculous is that we can’t just drive ourselves there and we have to drive to take a bus to the house, which is within spitting distance of my neighborhood. Apparently the organizers of this little shin-dig haven’t checked the gas prices lately! But before I dash out the door, I wanted to share a great reader request.


Melissa writes:
My daughter Isabelle is turning 3. The past few days we have discussed potential party themes...Spongebob, Lilo & Stitch, Princess...finally we (me) have settled on a "pink & green" theme. This is prob the last year I can get away with having the final say on party themes...so I want to make it nice. With that said...I have no idea what to do. Any thoughts for creative pink & green invite wording? I am planning on ordering cookies from the gal you recommended for the bowling birthday. That's all I've got. It's going to be in the afternoon in Bridgehampton, NY the weekend before Memorial Day. Any advice is most appreciated. You've always have such great ideas.

I love the idea of the tea party theme! I don't know if you'll like this, and I can't take credit for the idea, but I did do some digging and found a SUPER cute tea party idea... A Mad Hatter Tea Party!

Invitations Colorful and wacky. Instruct everyone to dress up in high-tea style.

Decorations As whimsically topsy-turvy as you remember from Alice in Wonderland. Cover the table with bright, clashing tablecloths. Put candlesticks of funny shapes and sizes down the center and adorn them with pink and yellow candles. Use chairs from different parts of the house: tall stools, upholstered uprights, dining-room standards, and so on. Play the Disney favorite in the background.

Activity Charades -- see who can best imitate the Queen, the Cheshire cat, and the rabbit.

Food Cupcakes frosted in green, blue, pink; sugar cookies with bright sprinkles; tea sandwiches cut into the shapes of stars and hearts. And of course tea served in a fancy old-fashioned pot. Hit yard sales beforehand for a mishmash of tea cups and saucers.

Now, if this is a little too "out there" for you, then you can still stick with the preppy pink and green theme. Still have the girls dress up in high-tea style, and purchase white gloves for all the little girls, sitting at their places. All the food and drinks should be pink and green. For instance, use pink lemonade or pink grapefruit juice, or make Shirley Temples for the little ladies as well for their tea party, and a separate special pink drink for the parents (hey, they did bring them to the party so we don't want to exclude them!). A pink and green cake, simple square low glass vases w/ pink and green roses, all stems and leaves clipped so all you see are the tops of the roses, is so elegant and pretty. Tie some pretty pink and green ribbons on the teacups and silverware, and even have them decorate a May Pole type activity, and at the top you could glue a vintage teacup. How beautiful would that be with all the ribbons streaming around the pole w/ a beautiful old delicate teacup on top?! I'm not sure what her room decor is like, but in my mind that would make for a pretty decoration and nice memory to keep in a little girls room.

I would also see if you could have a 3-D cake made in the shape of a teacup. Perhaps to match her invitations or the teacup on top of the little pole if you opt to do that activity. If you decide to do the Mad Hatter party, then you could also go online and print up some coloring pages for the children to color as well. For party favors, I would do a personalized teacup (name or monogram) and saucer for each little girl to take home with her, and maybe a custom cookie inside the cup. Try Laura Poland w/ Max's Mom's cookies (weddingcookie.com) who did my son's favor's for his b'day party in Feb. Call her up and tell her I sent you. She's wonderful and can pretty much do anything, even if you don't see it on the site. Sure, you could go to a much bigger company like Rolling Pin Productions, but I really like to try to support fellow mom's of small business whenever I can.

Oh, and don't forget you can also request your guests wear pink and green also, and have your family coordinate in the party theme as well! It will make for excellent photo opps! That's all I can come up with right now, but hopefully this will help a bit.

Good luck! I'm sure it will be smashing!

P.S. I have some cute photo's of cakes and the like that I'll try to post later. For some reason blogger was taking forever to upload photo's this morning.

My Socks are White with Pink Trim: Part 2

Let the Fun begin! I’ll keep updating as more questions come in so keep checking in...

Amy says:
Q. What are your three favorite stores to shop at for yourself?! What three stores do you most often shop at for yourself?!
A. Since I'm a SAHM, my daily attire pretty much consists of jeans, cropped pants, Bermuda shorts, A-line skirts, cable-knit sweaters, tee's, and polo shirts. So I pretty much stick to department stores since I wear a lot of Ralph Lauren, or Target (yes, don't gasp too loud, I love me some Target!), or Steinmart. Wait, I have to add Lands End in there too b/c I shop quite a bit from lands End too! So there's 4 for you!

Meg says:
Q. How did you get to be so amazingly crafty and creative?
A. Well you are really too kind, Meg! I wouldn't exactly say I'm amazingly crafty and creative, but I enjoy being crafty and creative. I really don't know how I got this way, I suppose I always had an eye for things and never really started to get into it until I got into College, then graduated and got married. Once I became a SAHM things really kicked into high gear for me as I had a lot more time to do what I liked to do and explore different things. For instance, my friend Ashley and I used to try new things like making quilts once (mine is still unfinished as she'll happily tell everyone in comments, I'm sure), and then learning to knit together (again, something that was not exactly my forte since my scarf looked like the state of Florida with a bunch of holes in it from dropping stitches). I think if I knew then what I know now, I would have majored in graphic design, but c'est la vie!

Chantel says:
Q. What I am most curious about….what do you look like. I have really enjoyed your blog. I would love to have a face to relate too. I have to say at first I was not sure if I would like it b/c I am not from the same pedigree, but I really feel as if we have a lot in common… but you have better ideas.
A. OH that's easy! I look just like Angelina Jolie-tall and skinny with really long legs. Ha ha ha. Chantel, you are very sweet and just because we may seem different on the surface and have had different upbringings doesn't mean we can't have a lot in common and wouldn't be friends in the real world! ;-) Seriously, I am 5'2 with really bright blue eyes, medium toned skin (although I get very very dark in the summer), shoulder-length brown hair with natural lighter brown highlights (seriously, they really are natural b/c I don't color my hair at all). My hair is EXTREMELY thick but I have to use a flat-iron to straighten it. I used to have thick board-straight wash and go hair, but when I was so sick with my anorexia and bulimia when I was a teenager I lost a lot of hair and my hair got very thin. As I started to get healthy and my hair started coming back in thick again, it came back wavy just in the back. It was very strange! And then it didn't change again until after I had mini #2 and now it's very wavy and curly. I alternate my hair length between either shoulder-length (which I wear flipped up usually) or long (well-past my shoulders) and when it's long I wear it up in a messy loose up-do mostly. Sadly, my days of wearing a size zero are but a distant memory, but I'm okay with my imperfect shape and have 2 boys to show for it!

Ashley says:
Q. OH...this one took a minute to ponder but I have a good one (drum roll please)...When are you going to come to NY/NJ to visit me :)
A. Gee I was wondering when you were going to ask me this since it's been a whole week since you last asked! Is the private jet all fueled up and ready to come pick me up? And when exactly is your trip planned to come see me?! All one-upping aside, I will be there as soon as I can pick out an adequate tranquilizer to give myself before hopping on a flight to NY (as you know I am no longer a very good flier), and Mr. Monogram can clear some time on his calendar to stay home and take care of the boys.

Anonymous says:
Q. Tell us about the details for the party! Steeplechases occur that same weekend and all this month and I am desperate for ideas!
A. Great question! I can't wait to fill you guys in on the party details, and I will do that later in the week. I am most excited about my tablescape (think turning your tabletop into a grassy lawn!) and general decor ideas. I am using colors to accompany my theme so I'm using reds (for red roses, the flower of the Derby), pinks, lime greens and grassy greens. There will be lots of roses but not in traditional vases, and LOTS of beautiful ribbons. I'll fill you in with more details on Thursday and hopefully I'll be able to give you a few ideas you can use for Steeplechase as well.

Kristi L. says:
Q. Hi Monogrammomma! I just wanted to thank you for entertaining me on a regular basis. Sometimes I am stunned by how much we have in common! I do have a question, what is on the menu for the Derby Party besides the obvious mint juleps? I love to hear the details on any party, but I am from KY, so I can't wait to hear more about your Derby shindig!
A. You're welcome, Kristi! Thanks for being a regular reader! I'm still working out the menu for the party but so far the menu looks like this: Louisville Benedictine, Fried Green Tomatoes, Grits Casserole, Cream Biscuits, Ham Biscuit Filling (for the Cream Biscuits), grasshopper Pie & cheese straws. I still need to work in some fruit and veggies and another dessert but so far that's what's on the menu.

J says:
Q. What's for dinner tonight?
A. Well J, tonight I am going all out with a "Caribbean Grill" Grilled Cheese sandwich with a side of fresh fruit salad. This recipe is SO AMAZING and I am planning on posting it tomorrow. It's still chilly here but it's so beautiful outside that I think we'll be dining al fresco and play a little Bocce Ball before dinner as well.

Jilly says:
Q. I want to have a Kentucky Derby party, I have had them in the past when I lived out East and enjoyed myself thoroughly. No one here is into the races or "gets" it, plus a friend of mine is having a cinco de mayo party, but has not sent out the invites yet. Do I trump her and her party and go ahead and do what I want. Is it too late to send out invites for a gathering May 5th? I have been struggling with this for almost a week.
A. This is a great question. If you have your heart set on doing this then I would call your friend and ask her if she's ordered her invitations yet and when she plans to send them out. Also ask her what time her event is scheduled to begin. The Derby is run at 5, and lasts about 5 whole minutes. So typically, most of the partying is done prior to the actual run of the race. My point is, it is entirely possible for each of you to have your respective party, but talk to your friend first. I wouldn't plan anything without letting her know your thoughts.

Preppy Rider says:
Q. I am not sure if you are into "scrapbooking" or not, but on Martha today she announced a new competition that had me thinking of you immediately! Go to her new/re-designed website for all the details but I am sure that you would be at the top of the list for creativity and ideas for beautiful scrapbooking pages (complete with monograms of course ;) We would all LOVE to see you on her show!
A. LOL! You know I am DYING to meet Martha and be on her show! But would you believe I am not a scrap booker? I know, it's quite shocking. I can appreciate all the work and time that goes into scrap booking, but it is too frustrating for me. Also, because I take children and pet photography in my "free time," it practically kills me to cut up my photo's! Maybe she'll do a monogramming competition, no?

Libby says:
Q. What are the invitation etiquette rules regarding No-Host dinner parties? By No-Host, I mean a celebration, usually dinner at a nice restaurant, for which individual guests are expected to pay their own bill. Often more formal than "hey, let's all go out to celebrate," but less formal then "the honor of your presence is requested." I see a lot of people my age doing this sort of thing because, let's face it, footing the bill for a table of 12 at a nice place is darn expensive. But what I guess I'm getting to here is: an invitation to such a party should clearly state that it is No-Host, should it not?
A. Hmmm.... I have never heard of no-host dinner parties, Libby so you have told me something new today! I understand the concept, but would think in this instance an e-vite should be sufficient or if you do send out an invitation, I would usually just assume it would be "Dutch." Plus, in a small group of people, I would think it could easily be spread word of mouth that it is a "no-host" dinner so it wouldn't need to be included on an invitation.

Anonymous says:
Q. I have seen you mention St. George Island as your favorite vacation destination. What do you like about it so much and what part do you go to? I searched on the net and it looks like there is an East End and a Plantation area.
A. I could go on and on forever about my love for St. George Island. It is completely unspoiled with only one commercial restaurant on the beach, and 1 very small hotel that is very old. Hotels, condo's and high rises are NOT allowed and will NEVER be built on the beach. Those 2 commercial beachfront properties I mentioned are allowed because they were grandfathered in as they've been around so long. Other than that, it is strictly private homes on private beach fronts, which is why we love it so much. I do not like going to commercial beaches and fighting for a spot on the sand, then having to listen to other people's conversations around me, and having to tote my stuff to and from the beach every day. With two little boys and a dog you can imagine we have a lot of things to bring to the beach! We stay in a private home with our own stretch of beach (the houses are also NOT stacked on top of each other as they are on lots of other beaches) and we literally leave our beach chairs, umbrella, and toys on the beach all week long and never have to bring them up or worry about anyone bothering with our things. There is nothing commercial there and to get to the grocery store you have to leave the island and drive about 15 minutes to Apalachicola (a great little shopping town), so we do nothing but read books, play in the sand and relax. Even at high season you feel like you are the only ones on the beach, and it's very quiet and relaxing. Dolphins jump in and out of the water so frequently you think you're at Sea World and the water is pretty much crystal clear and calm. We prefer to stay on the West side because we like the beach better there, but as you mentioned there is also an East side of the Island and the Plantation. The Plantation is where the stars have their houses and it's very "bushy" (lots of trees) and due to that, there are lots of mosquito's on the Plantation. The only benefit of The Plantation is that it's a gated community, but you are paying twice as much for the same size (if not smaller) house that you'll get on the rest of the island and they also sit farther away from the water's edge. The East side is currently going through a growth spurt of people building new homes down there so we don't like to stay on the East side. If you want more info, feel free to email me and I'll be happy to give you more information and some people to contact! P.S. SGI was also named one of the most dog friendly beaches in the country and dogs are welcome everywhere on the island, which is another reason we love it because preppy puppy loves to relax at SGI too!

Anonymous says:
Q. Lauren Ralph Lauren or Blue label ralph Lauren...Or Black Label or Collection. Green Label (Lauren) is not really RL, as it is designed oerseas and is merely a suburban money maker for those that have no idea about Collection, Black and Blue labels.
A. Much as I wish I could convince Mr. Monogram that even a SAHM should look stylish and deserves to pick up the kids from pre-school in Black Label, I stick to Lauren RL and the Blue Label collection primarily because I am very conservative (but you probably already figured that out by now)! ;-)

Sarah says:
Q. Hi MM! I am in awe of all of your preppy projects! How do you make the time? Can you tell us what a typical day is like in the Monogram household? Thanks! Sarah
A. Thank you, Sarah! I'm really glad to hear you are enjoying the projects. A typical day is crazy yet structured if that makes any sense. I do a lot while the boys are at preschool, while their napping, and after they go to bed. I also work on things while they're playing; I guess I just find the time somehow! Here's a basic time line of a day when the boys are not at preschool. I am very schedule oriented so this is very indicative of a regular day.
7am: Mini #1 comes to snuggle in bed with me while Mr. Monogram finishes getting dressed for work
7:30am: roll out of bed, make the bed, go potty, then downstairs to get cereal into bowls and milk into sippy-cups for the mini's
7:50am: first email check of the day
8am: wake up mini #2 and try to convince him it is really much better to be clothed for the day than wearing a pajama top and nothing on the bottom for the day (this can take any amount of time). He then has a breathing treatment whether he's healthy or sick. Then bring the boys down to eat b'fast while watching Noggin (I hop on the computer again while they're eating b'fast)
9am: I'm usually on the phone making plans for the day by this time while mini #1 is getting dressed.
9:30am: If we're doing a craft at home then usually we are hopping in the car to go get what we need if I haven't already done that the day before, or we're on our way to meet friends somewhere like to the park or another venue such as Pump it Up (the inflatable jumpy place) or shopping at the Mall
11:45ish am.: I am either making lunch if we're at home or if we're out and about with friends or doing some errands we stop for lunch (usually we meet friends for lunch if we're out)
1:30pm: The boys go potty then I put them in their room for nap time. I then rotate the laundry in the laundry room and either take a nap myself in my own bed or go downstairs to hop on the computer again to blog. Sometimes this is also when I work on my projects or sew or just do whatever it is that I want to do.
4pm: mini #1 comes out from his quiet time or nap time and we usually read a book or two and he plays quietly in the playroom/bonus room. I am still doing whatever it is that I was doing during nap time usually (unless I was napping and in which case he's woken me up by now)
4:30pm: mini #2 wakes up from nap time and both boys get a small snack and some milk or water while they play. This time of year they are outside a lot but if they're inside Noggin is on again while they play and I do some things around here, start dinner, etc..
5:45 pm: This is our first dinner seating of the evening where all those under the age of 5 are requested to sit down and eat dinner. I typically sit and have some fruit or a drink with them while they eat dinner at the kitchen table. They then go back to playing as I prepare for our second meal and seating of the day.
6:30-7pm: If I'm lucky, Mr. Monogram comes home at some point during this time and the second meal and seating for Adults is served.
7:15: Rotate the laundry again and usually holler at the boys to clean up their mess from playing. Then right in the shower or bath for the boys, then pj's (I also get in my pj's at this time too). Breathing treatment again for mini #2.
8pm: Mini's are in bed, stories read, and lights out at this point and Mr. Monogram and I sit down to watch tv. I am usually on his laptop while we watch tv or working on another project or finishing up my earlier project or even reading a magazine.
9:30pm: I'm in bed myself, tv on low and adding to my to-do list and reading before nodding off to sleep with preppy puppy (Mr. Monogram is a night owl)!

Anonymous says:
Q. What motivates you? What motivates you to complete your projects (I am a pro at starting them) dress cutely and do the whole SAHM thing with such ease? As an avid reader of your blog, I continue to be really impressed!
A. You are really far too kind! Trust me when I tell you there are plenty of days when I'm un-owered with no makeup on in yoga pants, barely keeping myself together as any one of my friends can tell you. I would be a liar if I told you otherwise! Don't get me wrong. That's certainly not the bulk of the time but rest assured I do have those days like everyone else. Being a SAHM was truly my "dream job." And while so many ladies I know are anxiously waiting for their kids to go to real school so they can go back to work, I have no interest. That will seem sad to some I'm sure, but for me, as tired as I am a lot of the time (which is why I sleep so much), I love having the luxury of being able to drop my kids off and pick them up from preschool, do craft and art projects with them, take them to sports practices and games, be the room mom and meet for playdates and outings at the park with friends. I realize it's not for everyone and some days I am really worn thin from tears and tantrums. But this is really what I foresee my life to be. As the boys get older, I will only be stretched more I think as I'll have two kids very close in age to get to different sports practices and games and balanace friends and laundry and helping with homework. So I guess what motivates me (aside from myself and my own curiosity to do projects) is my kids and just wanting to give them the best life I can, and to create lots of fun memories. I don't ever want them to look back and wish they had the opportunity to do something, so I want to make sure I give them all those opportunities that I can now (which is another reason I chose to stay home). My dad always said "You always want more for your kids than you had yourself." Truthfully, I had a really great life full of lots of advantages such as education, travel, friendships, and family togetherness (my parents have been married almost 42 years) and that's going to be a really tall order to beat! I have been very blessed and my parents worked very hard to give us the type of life that was important for their children to have, so I'm just trying to do the same thing in my own way. As for finishing the projects, don't feel bad. I have an unfinished quilt, some really horrible knitting projects gone bad, and plenty of even worse tasting recipes that will forever be skeletons in my "unfinished project closet!"

Kara says:
Q. i'm sure you'll have lots to blog about now that the truth came out about baby dannielynn! A. Oh, don't you just know it, Kara! I was so worried I would miss the live coverage that I ran into the boy's classes and was rushing them to get out to the car and home in bed for naps! And let me just say, for as wretched and selfish I think Howard K Stern has been about this DNA test for the last 7 months, I have to give him props for not challenging the custody and saying he will fully support Larry and make sure Larry gets full custody of his daughter. That being said, as I said before, TEAM BIRKHEAD!!!

Alyson says:
Q. So does Mr Monogram wear boxers or briefs???????????????
A. Ha Ha Ha. Very funny. Mr. Monogram wears boxer-briefs so the correct answer is neither!

Alyson says (again):
Q. How fast can you change a poopy diaper????????
A. In the height of my diaper changing days I must admit I was pretty quick! You might have known me as Quick Change Monogram. But that depends on the child. Mini #1 was a quick-change but mini #2 was a wiggler so he probably added a few more seconds onto my time. Let me know anytime you're up for a challenge!

Alyson says (seriously you can put this in one email comment!):
Q. What is your favorite cocktail?
A. Now this is a question I can get behind! It really depends on my mood. I am not a big wine drinker because it makes me too drunk too fast and leaves me with a really nasty hangover even after just 2 glasses. So if I'm mixing myself a cocktail at home, I always go for the Vodka in the freezer. I love Stoli Orange with Ginger-Ale or Stoli Lemon with Schwepp's Cranberry Ginger-Ale. When we're out I pretty much always order a Whiskey Sour and hanging out with friends I prefer beer (although I realize that's not a "cocktail").

Erin says:
Q. Hmmmmm...what was your major in college? And what's your favorite movie...I must confess that I think of Steel Magnolias while reading your blog sometimes! :)
A: Well you have good taste because I love Steel Magnolia's (except for the sad part which I just can't watch anymore)! But I am probably a rare bird in that I don't have any true favorite movies. As for my major, it was Psychology. I finished in 3 years (I still half expect them to call and tell me they goofed and I have to return my diploma!) and ended up focusing on I/O Psychology. I was looking at graduate programs but then Mr. Monogram and I got engaged 4 days after I graduated and I decided it would be much more fun to plan a wedding than to continue on with a graduate degree and the rest is history!

jhlomedico says:
Q. What is your opinion on address labels? Tacky or practical?
A. Definitely practical. But let me clarify. If you are asking about return address labels, then I am 100% behind those little stickers of convenience, especially since there are so many really cute or classic designs options out there. But if you're asking about address labels to actually send an envelope then it depends on the quantity. For instance, at Christmas I have roughly 160+ Christmas cards to send out and that is far too many for me to hand address so I do address labels (although I use the clear ones so it is not as obvious). That is truly the only time each year I do that though, and every other time for party invitations, thank you notes and birthday cards, I always hand address. If you are sending out 20 invitations then yes, I think it's tacky to use the printed label, but that's just my humble opinion.

Anonymous says:
Q. How did you and Mr. Monogram meet? How did he propose? We want details!
A. We met in College at the end of my freshman year right before Summer Quarter started. We were both planning on staying for the summer and we were introduced by my sorority big sister. I looked awful when we first met! We started hanging out by meeting at the tennis courts on campus and played a lot of tennis and going to all the summer parties together. He proposed on December 18th or 19th, 1997. Is that bad I can't even remember now? Anyway, I had just graduated from Auburn 4 days prior and it was the eve of his company Christmas Party. So he proposed to me in the parking lot here. He was very nervous and I always joke that I should get a do-over of the proposal. A parking lot?! Really?! He said he was just too nervous and needed to get it over with, but he'd also previously asked my dad for permission.

Candy says:
Q. I apologize if this is a bit rude...BUT you must have a housekeeper, right?? How do you get all the cleaning done? Husbands everywhere should clone you!
A. If you only knew how hard I was laughing right now, Candy! Nope, I no longer have a housekeeper. I always used to (a brief moment of silence for Christina, please) and then when we moved here I went through literally 6 housekeepers. All of them were beyond horrible and and ridiculous in price so it was really frustrating and irritating that I'd still have to go back and clean after them. And none of them did windows. Uh, helllo? That's sort of part of cleaning the house, is it not? So I clean my own house, although very begrudgingly. Every 2 weeks I pick a day while the boys are in preschool and pop my ADD meds and just nail it out. It is truly my least favorite chore!

Candy says:
Q. I swear I am not trying to hog the questions, but I can't help it! So what is a typical date night for the monograms? Your life sounds oh so glamorous!!
A. Oh, Candy you are really cracking me up today! My life is far from glamorous! Mr. Monogram and I do go out a lot but it's not all that exciting. If we go out alone on a date then we usually go to a nice restaurant and movie. But lately we've both been too full and tired after dinner to actually make the movie so we end up at Borders Bookstore. See, I told you that is just not very glamorous! Oh wait! Last weekend we went out to a great dinner for his birthday and topped that off by.....Are you ready???? An evening at Target.! WhooHoo! Now if we are going out on a double date with friends, we will typically go to a nice dinner, then to another restaurant in this historic house here and have martini's outside and listen to the live jazz band. Of course there are always exceptions that we'll spice things up a bit but those are typical dates for us.

Anonymous says:
Q. I think somewhere you blogged that you have two sisters? I am one of three girls. Are your sister(s) as Monogram-ish as you?? Or are you all different? My sisters and I couldn't be more different and I would love to learn about yours!
A. This is a good one! No one has asked about my sisters yet! Yes, I am the youngest of three girls. Sister #1 lives in Orange Co, CA with her family, and sister #2 lives in Atlanta (Sandy Springs) with her famiy. We are each very different but still very similar if that makes any sense. We are all very traditional and conservative but Sister #1 is probably less conservative than #2 and myself. I am definitely the most conservative and anal retentive of the bunch. They don't have everything all monogrammed like I do, although they do believe in dressing little ones in smocked and monogrammed jon-jon's and dresses. However I think that is more of a product of where we are from than is refelctive on our individual tastes and styles. Sister #1 is very fair skinned with blonde-ish hair and brown eyes. She is maybe 5' on a good day and has more of my figure. Sister #2 is my height at 5'2, has very dark brown nearly black hair with dark brown eyes and has an entirely different figure from #1 and I. But sister #2 and I have always resembled eachother the most. Sister #1 has a girl and a boy (11 and almost 5) and sister #2 has two girls (6 & almost 2). Sister #1 married her High School sweethart (they've been together over 25 years now I think) and Sister #2 married her grammer school sweethart! Sister #1 has just recently gone back to work full-time after being a SAHM and sister #2 is a SAHM like myself. My sisters are also very crafty and creative, and it's great becuase we call eachother and ask for help or ideas if we're stuck trying to figure something out. Particularly sister #2 and I (ssiter #1 tends to roll her eyes over the phone at a lot of my projects!) . Sister #1 doesn't think she's crafty or creative though but I tend to disagree with her assessment. She makes really beautiful handmade cards, which is something I don't do. Neither of them sew, however (although sister #2 has a machine and has sewn a little). Out of the three of us, sister #1 is by far the best cook. She is the type of person who can experiement and throw stuff into a pot on the stove and it always turns out great. We are all musically inclined and we all played tennis. They never sang like I did though. We do all have our own little personality quirks though and we still bicker and get on eachothers nerves with these "quirks." For instance, you know I can't stand people being late, and it's caused more than one argument with my sisters over this. But that's life and I can't change it and there are plenty of things about me that drive them crazy (I'm fairly certain they think I'm a b**** a lot of the time!). As you know, being one of three girls creates a very interesting dynamic!

Mrs. P says:
Q. Hey MM- I want to know what you will be wearing for your Derby party?
A. Well that is a very good question, Mrs. P. I had originally planned on wearing a casual little white strapless dress with a white cardigan, navy and white espadrilles and a navy sash around my waist (my hat is big and navy with lots of feathers), but I did not like the dress once it arrived and I tried it on. Perhaps the dress didn't like me, but either way, it's on it's way back. Foolishly I'd fallen in love with the hat and bought that first so now the outfit must come together around the hat (I know this is something you would probably not approve of!). Suffice-to-say, I'm now hunting for another white simple strapless A-Line dress or a white shirtdress. I'm not too worried since they seem to be everywhere, but I haven't ruled out the possibility of searsucker yet either. I'll keep you posted when the decision is made!

Deidre says:
Q. How you ever get 2 boys that age to nap for 3 hours a day is a miracle! Do you use cough syrup??!!!! I would kill for 2-3 hours a day in the middle of the afternoon! Benadryl anyone?
A. LOL! No, I most certainly don't hop them up on Benadryl, but as I've mentioned I am very schedule oriented. We "Baby Whispered" both of our boys as newborns and got them sleeping through the night and on a really great schedule right out of the gate. When they were babies they went down for morning naps from 9-11 every day, then afternoon naps from 2-5. When they dropped their morning naps (we allowed them to drop them themselves, and not dictate when it was time to do that-21.5 months and 19 months respectively), their afternoon nap moved back by 30 minutes to 1:30. Both of our children have always been excellent sleepers and nappers, and really thrived on good nap schedules, but it's also because we have taught them to be that way. It took a lot of work from both of us as you can imagine! On the occasions when our children haven't had enough sleep or enough of a nap, it's very evident in their behavior. That is why our days pretty much revolve around naptime because we know how much they need it. Now, I will say, mini #1 who just turned 5 is getting away from his nap. And that's fine, but if he doesn't sleep he still needs to have som "quiet time" in his room. He needs it as much as I do, even if he's just relaxing looking at books, he really benefits from it. So to sum up, I swear by The Baby Whisperer to anyone out there!

Anne says:
Q. Found your blog. How cute. Is there a reason you do not eat as a family? Is it some kind of tradition or your husband just does not want to deal with kids at that time of day? Mine snack earlier and then we eat later-so many lovely moments over the years at the table together. I think I would miss them a lot if we changed it. ANd I am talking FIVE children. :)
A. While I see you have a very good point, Anne, that has never really worked for our family as much as I've tried. And no, it's not because my husband doesn't want to deal with the kids as he is a very hands on dad and would very much like to be here for dinner with them. You can read this post and get a general idea, but the problem lies within my husband and me never knowing when he's going to arrive home from the office. It goes in spurts of months at a time when he's at the office often 13-15 hours some days, and on those days I actually bring dinner to him and we eat as a family in his Conference Room. I can't very well expect my kids to wait until 7 to eat when they go to bead at 8 either, since that's typically a "normal" time for him to be home during non-busy times. They still sit at the table with us and will often have their dessert while we eat dinner, but Monday-Thursday it just doesn't typically work out.

Donna says:
Q. I loved you Q & A session! My question is this: if you had given birth to a daughter, what would you have named her? I love names, have a friend who is having a girl, and thought you might have some original ones to give her for suggestions!
A. Yeah, this was lot's of fun, wasn't it?! Well you must know I love this question since I have two boys and no girls. I really swore up and down mini #2 was going to be a girl because I was carrying differently and I just felt completely different too. You could have knocked me over with a feather in the ultra-sound room when the lady told us it was a boy. Whew! We always loved the name Isabella (that was Mr. Monogram's first choice) but that was before it was as popular as it is now. I wouldn't use it now. I swear if a mom calls out "Isabella!" at the park about 3 girls turn around. We also liked Sofia and Eva. But not EEEE-va, pronounced in Italian it phoenetically sounds like Ava. Other girl names I liked were Luca, & Giada (this was before the famed chef though!). We probably would have gone with Sofia or Eva though to tell you the truth. We had a hard time agreeing on names!

Chantel says:
Q. Do your sister's have a blog?
A. Nope! Just me!

I Am Not 180 Mill. Wealthier (but at least I can make a mean Mint Julep)

You will be disappointed to know that no, we did not win the big lotto Saturday night. I know, I’m still dealing with the aftershocks myself. I really thought we had it in the bag, you know. You would THINK with it being my birthday and all yesterday that the “gods” would have smiled upon me and at the very *least* given me a few numbers on the ticket. But nope, apparently I’ve royally ticked someone off (although it would not be the first time I should probably admit). So I'm sorry, but there will be no private jets for all of us (and our dogs, because you know I am all about my preppy puppy) for a fun monogram momma hosted all expenses-paid bash in the Caribbean. *sigh* But stay tuned because it could totally happen next time. Don’t you think?

So despite not winning the lottery (although I should tell you I was really hoping we DID win and Mr. Monogram was just waiting to spring it on me after I blew out those trick candles he & the mini’s put on my cake, somewhere after the Happy Birthday song and before opening my cards), I was still able to have a really nice birthday. I received exactly what I asked for which was a) total yard/house work compliance from Mr. Monogram without complaining about it (after all I do have a very important party to prep for) and b) the exact gift I asked for. We also went out to my favorite restaurant Saturday night and had a great time.

So, my gift. In December when Nikon released their latest Digital SLR, the D80, it really had my name in pink and green all over it. I also really wanted to consolidate all of my other cameras and equipment and this was just what I’d been waiting for. So my new camera was ordered and should be here by the end of the week (can’t wait!), and I am also getting all this great new equipment as well. I’ll keep you posted when it arrives because I can’t wait.

But until then, today I need a little help from you. Yes, I know, shutter to think that I actually am having some difficulty with some initiations. But I am. So here’s the deal. We have decided to have a big Kentucky Derby party. So after much debate, I’ve finally got the gist of my wording down, but am having trouble with a few things. I’ll give you the actual party planning details and specifics a little later (which has now included adding onto our deck among other minor details, but I digress), but here is what I’m struggling with.

1) Font Here are a few choices I like for fonts. Let me know which one you like the best.

2) Children This is an adult only party. But I can not figure out a polite way to put that on an invitation. Typically, if this were in the evening, I wouldn’t need to say anything, but since it is in the middle of the day, I do think this is necessary. Much as I might love your precious little Bobby Sue, there will be no juice boxes served at this event so I would prefer if she were at home with a babysitter.

3) Attire We will be having a Parade of Hats so I am requesting that all the ladies wear hats, which is traditional Derby Day attire. How should I word that? I’ve shown two options in the examples, but any other ideas would be great. And while we’re on the subject of attire, I’ve also shown here “Garden Party Attire” but Alyson has since told me that is confusing. Any thoughts? It should be sundresses, linen slacks, seersucker, etc.. Hence, “garden party attire.”

Font Choice 1

Font Choice 2

Font Choice 3

Font Choice 4

Help, please!!!

Reader Requests: Four Letter Monogramming

I swear I must get this question in email about once a week, regarding the proper way to do a four letter monogram. So for that reason, I'm going to throw out a reader request and answer it in case anyone else is searching for this info.


Brandi writes:
Please help me! My daughter’s name is Reese Avery Elizabeth Loya. What is the proper way to monogram when you have 4 initials?


In today's world, pretty much anything goes in terms of monogramming, although I tend to stick to the old-fashioned rules. In this case, you have a few options. Below are the options I sent to another reader who had the same request. Obviously, you would substitute the correct initals for the ones below.


1) Monogram with the initials in the correct order, all the same size: MANB



2) Do the last initial flaked by a dot on each side (centered on the initial though): •B•



3) If by chance, Miller Ann is hyphenated, then you would monogram: M-ABN


4) If by chance, Noble Bryerly is hypehnated, then you would monogram: MN-BA




5) Some people actually drop one of the middle names for monogramming. For instance, if you (or she) prefers Elizabeth as her middle name over Avery (or vice versa), then use that initial to create a traditional three letter monogram such as this: RLE




6) Or, you could do a more modern monogram that has been gaining popularity such as doing a small M, then UNDER that, an A, then UNDER that, an N, then to the RIGHT in LARGE, a B: see included example



If all else fails, then check with your monogrammer. See if she can help you create a beautiful and unique four letter monogram that you will want to stick with and use. Unfortunatley there are no real "rules" for a four letter monogram so in this case, you should do what you like the best.


P.S. Check back later for a few new preppy finds and sales!

Reader Requests: Ready to Smock

I was so elated last night to see my local weatherman interrupting the shows to tell us we are under a Winter Storm Advisory. Horray! I LOVE winter storm advisory's! BRING ON THE SNOW!! Okay, so I'm not so much loving the empty shelves of bread, peanut butter and milk, but whatever.

Have sleds? CHECK!

Ski Jackets & Bibs for everyone? CHECK!

Mittens and Waterproof gloves? CHECK!

Hot chocloclate ready to go? CHECK!

So while I wait with anticipation (praying we actually see the snow!) we are heading out to the Childrens Museum this morning so I don't have a whole lot of time to post so I thought I'd share a reader request today. Stay warm!

Courtney writes:
A southerner living in Kansas and want to smock a dress for a friend who recently had her 4th child, 2nd marriage, difficult pregnancy, miracle baby. Ready to smock but do not want to make dress. Any sites?


This is a very good question and one that has required a little bit of digging since I am not a smocker myself (although I would LOVE to learn).

My first recommendation would be to go to your local better sewing shop where they make and sell fabrics and smocking supplies. A lot of times, these little shops will have ladies who will make the dress for you but you can do the smocking. So give that a try.

Second of all, I would check into and call Chadwick Heirlooms. Give them a call and they may also have what you are looking for. I also found this selection of ready-to-smock dresses and baby clothes from a little shop in CA. Now, the more I kept digging, I also found another lady who has a nice selection of ready-to-smock here as well. But Martha Pullen seemed to have the best prices. However, the very BEST prices can be found on ebay by clicking here. All I did was enter "ready to smock" in the search field and it delivered some good results with great prices. I also found this selection on Ebay Express which is a little more expensive, but allows you to buy it immidiately and get started.

I hope you find what you're looking for with these suggestions. Good luck!

Reader Requests: Breaking up Is Hard to Do

I hope you’ll understand, but today I’m going to put Martha on the sideburner to address a reader request. Read ahead and I’m sure you’ll understand. Someone out there needs some girlfriend help and monogram momma is not about to abandon a fellow mom and heartbroken girlfriend.

Anonymous said:
Have been reading your site for a while and appreciate your humor and dedication to family. I need a little advice...I am also a SAHM, 6 y/o daughter and twin girls who are five (yes, I am busy). Husband has big desk and big job. I rely on friends for support. But I feel two friends slipping away. They socialize without me and the daily phone calls to each other are happening less and less. This is BREAKING MY HEART. I have tried to be subtle in asking if I have offended anyone but they insist nothing is wrong, obviously something is off. I really don't want to lose these friends. I am 41 y/o and true friends are few at this age. Please...send some age advice.


I’ve been thinking about this a lot and really appreciate your question. And candor for that matter. Doesn’t growing up really stink sometimes? And it’s especially hard to maintain close girlfriend relationships especially once we throw a few kids into the mix because life just get so crazy busy. Don’t I know it. It almost makes me think 7th grade catfights and note passing were just a foreshadowing of things to come. I mean, why can’t we all just get along? Why can’t women be nice to one another? I suppose that’s the million dollar question. But I assure you, you are not alone.

About 10 months ago I went through this exact same thing. I mean EXACT. It was devastatingly heartbreaking so I completely know what you are feeling right now. And it makes it so much worse when the friends won’t respect you enough to tell you what is wrong or why they seem to be shutting you out. For nearly a year there were three of us that were inseparable (as were our children), and then all of the sudden, like you mentioned, phone calls were coming to a halt, I was being excluded from things, and Mr. Monogram & I were being excluded from couples get-togethers also with this group. To make matters worse, when I asked one of the girls what was going on and let her know my feelings were really hurt, she just tried to blow it off and make up one lie after another (and I think you know how I feel about lying). That was the other thing. They were not only excluding me, but then lying about what they had done too. Like they were sneaking around. And I suppose that was the party that really hurt the most. Talk about kicking a dog when she’s down!

To me, I look for the same thing in a friend that I would in a mate or someone I would have a relationship with. Honesty, integrity, loyalty, sense of humor, values, someone who’s down to earth, someone who I can respect and will respect me back, someone I can count on, etc. Those things are equally as important and double sided in a friendship I think. I mean, it’s not fair to expect those things of other people if they can’t expect them from you. And if you can’t count on your friends having your back and looking past a few of your imperfections, then really, are they truly your friends? The answer is no. Sometimes it just takes us women a little while to figure that out about people.

So just like breaking up in a relationship deserves an explanation, so does breaking up or severing a friendship. These girls should have enough respect for you to tell you what is wrong. Even if they just want space. They owe that to you as a friend. Wouldn’t you rather know and be hurt than not-know and just continue to be excluded? The pain just drags out forever, like slowly ripping off a bandaid as opposed to just quickly ripping it off. Unfortunately, some people, as was the case with these friends of mine, don’t know how to handle mature adult, friendly confrontation. And instead of being able to talk to me about it and accept their responsibility of how they were mistreating me, they decided to bury their heads in the sand and just avoid the whole situation all together and insist nothing was wrong (yeah, right). After a few whole-hearted attempts on my behalf really honestly talking to one of the girls (the follower, we’ll call her) and getting absolutely nowhere (sure, she would apologize but how sincere is it when she turns around and excludes me and lies to me a few days later and then stops communicating with me?), I just decided that I had to protect myself and my own feelings, and quietly pull myself away and stop calling. Naturally, they never called me either. It was the only thing left to do, since they’d made me feel like they didn’t need my friendship anymore anyway. They had already done an excellent job of pushing me away (not calling, returning calls, or being invited to do things will do that, no?), it’s just that I wasn’t ready to accept it because I really counted and relied on these relationships and wasn’t ready to bid them farewell. If I did that, then it meant I would be alone and lonely again with no *real* local friends and would be right back to where I started when I moved here (which essentially consisted of accosting moms at the park who seemed friendly and had nice children the mini’s ages).

In my case, there was one girl who was the ring leader and the other who you can tell, has never been anything other than a follower her whole life (which is the last thing you could ever say about monogram momma, that’s for sure). Why would that change in adulthood? Well, it doesn’t for those people who can’t seem to think or do anything on their own and always need the approval of someone else. And the “ring leader” gal was the type who is always looking for the next best thing. They type who thinks the grass is always greener on the other side of the mountain, and won’t hesitate to replace a friend if she comes across a newer, shinier, prettier, [skinnier] funnier new model. Oh she’ll do it slowly so you really have no idea what’s going on, as they did this exact same thing to another girl before I came into the mix, but she’ll do it all the same, time and time again. But monogram momma doesn’t work that way! If you’ll remember, I’ve mentioned several times that I’ve got a great group of prep school friends. We’ve been together nearly 20 years now, and in that time, have been through dating, puberty, first dates, heartbreaks, first kisses, tons of groundings from our parents, two parents dying from cancer, college, a divorce, babies, etc. Basically, every single milestone since we were kids, has been shared together and at this point in our relationships, there isn’t anything we can’t say to one another. So knowing that I know how to maintain a lifelong friendship and the fact that these girls really don’t have any friends they’ve kept longer than 4 years, is also something I keep in mind. It’s not my fault. This friendship breakup was not my fault and I did everything I could to save it and talk it out and figure out what went wrong. Some girls, no matter how much we want them to remain our friends and we count on them, and no matter how many fun memories we have together, just don’t know how to maintain a long term relationship with other women and get bored and start looking for replacements. Sad, but true.

I’m not a therapist, so all I can do is tell you my own experiences and how I’ve dealt with it and offer you some advise. You can take it or leave it; the choice is yours. But if you want to save these friendships, then really sit down and talk to them. Don’t step around it on tip-toes and just assume that they know you’re hurt. Really sit down for a girls lunch out without the kids and just tell them sweetly that your feelings are hurt and you want to know what’s going on. Don’t just accept their “oh, don’t be silly, everything is fine!” at face value. Tell them that you respect and value their friendships, and thought that they did too. But that they really need to be able to talk to you about what’s going on so you can move past it. You have to approach it as you would any relationship worthy of saving, and tell them how important they are to you as well. If they are sincere about saving your relationship and nothing being wrong, then they will make an honest effort. Put the ball in their court. Wait and see when they call you after the sit-down conversation. If they were sincere that nothing is wrong, then they will pick up the phone and call you to make the effort. If they still continue hurting you, then maybe it’s time to consider that your friends too, are seeking out a greener pasture, no matter how much that hurts (and believe me, I know how much that hurts, girlfriend).

I don’t know how often you see these girls, but in my case, I have to see these women at pre-school 3 times a week. Ughhh. And while it was very difficult at the beginning of the year, I don’t let it bother me any more because I know that I tried everything I could to save those relationships but got nothing back from them on their end, other than lots of lies and excuses. I don’t have to look down at the ground or off to the left in avoidance when I pass them (nope, I’m holding my head high and looking straight ahead!). And you know what? I’m better than that, and so are you! I know I’m a great friend and I have a lot to offer. I know that I go out of my way to help out my friends and support them, but that I also deserve the same thing in return from people. You have to take care of yourself too, and if you’re not being treated with equal respect and thoughtfulness by these friends, then maybe they aren’t the people you thought they were or are worth staying so hurt over. **Right now Britney Spears’ song “Toxic” comes to mind. **

So what do you do next if they still continue to snub you? Well, you just have to pick yourself up and move on. No matter how bad it hurts-and it will hurt. You have to take the high road and smile and wave when you see them, but still protect yourself and not go out of your way for them anymore. You have to stay tight-lipped about them when you are in the presence of mutual friends, and just continue to plow through life, keeping an open heart for new friends. I was so fortunate to be able to connect and find some really fabulous new friends, that I really enjoy being with, and you will too. And lucky for us, there are also some great books you can pick up too (which I’ve scattered into the post here so go have a look-see at them when you get a chance). So whether you pick these up for yourself or have them drop-shipped to these ladie's houses from Amazon as a little subliminal message (he he he), something in these books I’ve included might also just be what you need.

I don’t know if you read it, but when I was asked about sanity and friendships from The Family Groove, I replied, “I will admit, there are plenty of days I am not quite sane at all. Having two children in a year and a half will do that to you, no? But for me, that's where my friendships come into play and why they are so important. Good friends can tell you you're not alone and let you complain and whine about your lack of sanity and how you accidentally put the milk in the microwave and your keys in the refrigerator. Then they'll come pick up your kids for you while you look for said missing keys and thus give you time to try to regroup and reclaim your sanity (or what is left of it anyway). The playground can be just as difficult and childish for moms as it can be for our kids. Let's face it, the sandbox is a tough place—full of judgmental, cliquey, catty women—so it's often times difficult to find that groove and group of your own, but it's so important. I am so lucky to have a great supportive group of friends, both with and without children to support me, and to support one another.”

So just remember, the playground IS full of cliquey, catty women and you’re not alone in dealing with these issues with other women. And no, unfortunately it doesn’t get any easier as we get older. I don’t know why I ever thought it would, but I sure was under that false illusion. One day, talking to one of my best friends from prep school, Ashley, I was telling her how I felt like I had to let go of a friendship with another girl. I felt so bad about it and it had been coming for years and years, but the bottom line was, it wasn’t a real healthy or honest relationship for me to be in anymore. Meaning, she always had a hard time being honest and always came across like she felt she has to be super competitive with me and my life. And if you’re my friend, then I just don’t care. There’s no competition, we’re friends and equals and you should just not lie to me about things in your life. I don’t care how much your husband makes, nor do I want to talk about it (especially if I know you are lying through your teeth about it too). It just isn’t appropriate. So chatting with Ashley, and telling her it was really hard for me to do this, she said something that made me feel a lot better. She said that she is all about ending bad friendships, and just doesn’t feel bad anymore about having to sever relationships that aren’t giving her anything in return. Life is too short and she’s worth more than that. And she’s right. I shouldn’t feel bad about severing a friendship that is making me feel bad all the time. And you shouldn’t feel bad either, if it’s what you need to feel better about yourself.

Look, I sooooooooooo understand the importance and value you put on your friends as a support system. Mr. Monogram also has a “big desk job” as you put it, and lately he’s been sitting behind said desk for 13-15 hours a day and stuck with that damn cell-phone to his ear all time too. I live in a city with no family either, so I have to rely on my friends a lot of days to give me the interaction and support and camaraderie that I so desperately need. You know the old saying “It takes a Village” and you and I both know, it really DOES take a village to raise children. I hope you can find your “village” and find the resolution and peace with these ladies that you both need and deserve. I really hope it works out and they come around becase I knwo that's what you want. Good luck, and if you ever want to chat more about what you’re going through, always feel free to email me because I have been there before, and I’m sure I’ll be there again.

P.S. Tomorrow we're jumping right back into creative crafty things and preppy projects so start your engines!

Reader Requests: 07 Agendas & Calligraphy Markers

I know I haven't exactly been "wow-ing" you guys with any big projects or ideas lately. But I'm working on a big organization post for next week, and in the middle of working on a ribbon embellished dust ruffle and roman shade as well. You'll be hearing about those next week.

Today I've got a few reader requests to answer because I've been a little behind on that, but then later this afternoon I've got a really fun and exciting announcement to make for all of you celebrity gossip obsessed folks besides me out there! So make sure you check back!

Laura writes:
Besides saying hello, I was looking to see if you have any suggestions on where to find cute day planners/organizers. I picked up a black leather bound one a few years ago and it is definitely looking worse for wear, plus I would love to find a bright color. Any suggestions?

Well, Laura, Horchow has really beautiful crocodile embossed leather yearly planners, address books, and journals in all our favorite preppy colors that you can also personalize. Alyssa also pointed out that the Kate Spade “Debra Pocket” small sized planners are now on sale for $52 at See Jane Work. With colors like black with a chartreuse green inside or white with pink combo, how can you go wrong? Of course, the Mom Agenda is also a big hit which can also be picked up at See Jane Work.

Perhaps my favorite agenda’s are from Neiman’s. I love the pink and green, but you shouldn’t really be surprised at that, and what’s more is you can also have it personalized. Yippee!
And I think you know how I feel about Coach. In fact, you could probably find it inscribed on a tree inside a heart somewhere, so I also suggest you go take a look at what Coach has to offer in the way of preppy little planners. But after you check out the planners at Coach, head over to eLuxury (oooh La Laaaaaa) and perhaps a little Louis Vuitton number might catch your eye.

Oh! And don’t forget checking out the old classics like the updated Malibu collection from Daytimer which comes in some great colors and prices, as does Franklin Covey have some really fabulously stylish and colorful options as well. But, if you’re not looking for something you don't have to make a lifetime commitment too and just looking for something colorful and cute to get you through the year, then you must check out the Vera Bradley Agenda in Java blue (which I am seeing everywhere this season) or petal pink.

Nancy writes:
I have been searching all over the internet for some special pens. I am about to start addressing my wedding invitations (no calligraphy here though!)...and I am looking for a dark brown pen to address them in. (my colors are chocolate and sky blue) I live in a small town in Eastern NC and there are no craft shops for hours. I have a Sanford Calligraphy Marker in black that writes at the width that I like, but have had NO luck finding a brown one. I'm trying not to have to buy boxes of sets of pens, because I'd rather just buy a bunch of brown ones individually. Any suggestions on where to look online for something like this??

Actually, yes! Online, you will want to hit Marker Supply for sure and take a look at these. Praise the marker God’s they come in brown! But also check out a few online scrapbooking stores. I am not a scrapbooker myself but there are a million online stores just waiting out there when I goggled it.

Second of all, if you have a friend (or bridesmaid perhaps?) who happens to live near JoAnn’s, Hobby Lobby, or Michael’s, then I would see if they wouldn’t mind talking a stroll down the scrapbooking aisles. There are all sorts of scrapbooking pens and pens for photo archiving that are probably exactly what you are looking for, and I do know they come in brown.

Help Needed

No, I'm not placing a Want Ad. Well, ok. Maybe I sort of am. Here's what I'm looking for...

A loyal monogram momma reader emailed me a request that I simply can not do on my own. Yes, that's right. Hence, the "Help Needed" notice above. So I now need the help of my fabulously creative and responsive readers to help out a fellow reader. And well, help out monogram momma because I have been wracking my brain for DAYS over this, literally writing all sorts of brainstorming lists, and I keep coming up with ZERO. So here are the specifics.

Reader J has just moved into a new abode. So since she was too busy unpacking boxes during the holidays, she decided, very cleverly I might add, to have a housewarming/Chinese New Year party. Like I said, clever, right? I mean, talk about a built in theme! So she's got all her decorations, food, linens and dishes figured out, but she's missing the key ingredient. The invitation. She needs help coming up with cute/creative/clever wording for her invitation. So there you have it.

Can you please help out a fellow reader and make any comments or suggestions as to how she should word her invitations? Any and all suggestions welcome since again, neither one of us has been able to come up with anything creative at all!

Now, in case this will help, here are a few things I've brainstormed that might help you put something together...

chinese new year
new house
housewarming
fortune cookie
chopsticks
good luck
year of the dog
food is ready, paper things al hung
Ni Hao 4707
New Year, a New Home!
Fortunes and Food
chopsticks & Rice

P.S. I'll be back with a preppy project later on! Would you believe I'm still vacuming pine needles and moving furniture back around? Grrrrrrrrrrrr.

Help Needed

No, I'm not placing a Want Ad. Well, ok. Maybe I sort of am. Here's what I'm looking for...

A loyal monogram momma reader emailed me a request that I simply can not do on my own. Yes, that's right. Hence, the "Help Needed" notice above. So I now need the help of my fabulously creative and responsive readers to help out a fellow reader. And well, help out monogram momma because I have been wracking my brain for DAYS over this, literally writing all sorts of brainstorming lists, and I keep coming up with ZERO. So here are the specifics.

Reader J has just moved into a new abode. So since she was too busy unpacking boxes during the holidays, she decided, very cleverly I might add, to have a housewarming/Chinese New Year party. Cleaver, right? I mean, talk about a built in theme! So she's got all her decorations, food, linens and dishes figured out, but she's missing the key ingredient. The invitation. She needs help coming up with cute/creative/clever wording for her invitation. So there you have.

Can you please help out a fellow reader and make any comments or suggestions as to how she should word her invitations. Any and all suggestions welcome since again, neither one of us has been able to come up with anything creative at all!

Now, in case this will help, here are a few things I've brainstormed that might help you put something together...

chinese new year
new house
housewarming
fortune cookie
chopsticks
good luck
year of the dog
food is ready, paper things al hung
Ni Hao 4707
New Year, a New Home!
Fortunes and Food
chopsticks & Rice

P.S. I'll be back with a preppy project later on! Would you believe I'm still vacuming pine needles and moving furniture back around? Grrrrrrrrrrrr.

Reader Requests: Holiday Card Etiquette

So, would you believe that the 160 dog-gone pictures I ordered from Snapfish for our Christmas cards A) were printed with a glossy finish and not matte as I requested (I have an unnatural disdain for glossy ghigh sheen prints) and B) the color is so dark on mini #2’s face that it looks like there is a big shadow? UGHH! I feel like flinging them right back at the brown UPS truck that just pulled away from the driveway that delivered these things, but it’s a good thing I have better manners than that and that I also realize that desperate times call for desperate measures. And that means I need to suck it up and send it out as is. They really don’t look all that bad I guess, I just happen to be a tad picky about certain things, and my pictures are one of them. Whatever. It’s done. I need to move on from it (or put it on the short list of things I need to discuss in therapy next time).

But speaking of holiday cards, Susan emailed me with a holiday card etiquette question that I thought was a great one to share.

While showing my mother our holiday cards last night, she said “shouldn’t you have listed your husband’s name first and then yours?” I looked this up in Peggy Post and the only rule that I really found was that some people think the woman’s name should come first, some think the person writing the cards should sign their name last, and that if there are children involved, the father’s name always comes first. So, I don’t think I was wrong to put: Susan, hubby and puppy but I am wondering your opinion. On invitations, if a couple is hosting it would be listed Susan and husband last name, wouldn’t it?

When it comes to questions over written etiquette, I tend to always refer to my Crane's Blue Book of Stationery. It truly is a book I think everyone should own and I can tell you my own copy is both well worn and well loved. I hope you hedged a little bet over this because here's the deal. When sending a holiday card (or card in general), the woman's name should appear first (if using individual names), followed by her husband's name. If there are children, then their names should appear on the next line beneath their parents' names (of course, typing this I’m realizing I was in such a hurry to get mine printed I put Mr. M’s name first-YIKES! I'm now HORRIFIED!). Therefore, you are indeed correct!

Now, given what I've stated above, there are, as always, a few things to keep in mind. As you know, I tend to follow a hard line on traditional etiquette and wording and the proper placement of names and monograms. However, it is almost 2007 and the world has relaxed a bit, so in terms of Christmas cards being much more casual and fun these days (we are so lucky to have so many fantastic internet options!!) and not the basic ecru card it was in the past, I do think this is one of those times you can relax a little. In this day and age, sometimes a family is just too big to list all the members properly, sometimes there is only one parent, some times there may be 2 mom's or even two dads! So I think we have to keep those little things in mind a bit.

But like I said, congratulations, you are correct and I hope you won some money out of that bet!

Reader Requests: Holiday Gift Giving

I know. Twice in one day, right? Well pick yourself up from off the floor because if you read this morning you know I promised a second post today. Holiday gift giving is so difficult, and that is especially true when there are people you both need and want to buy for, but that you maybe don't know all that well. For instance, your children's teachers, your assistant (or your husband's assistant), the babysitter, the dogsitter, etc... So in light of these more challenging gifts to buy, a reader named Sarah B. emailed me with a great question.....

I loved the post you did about gift ideas (monogrammed book marks etc) but need some (more!) advice; I am looking for presents for people in my husband's office, his secretary, receptionist, doormen etc- any ideas? I don't know them well enough to know their monograms but would love to give them thoughtful Christmas presents as they do a great job all year long! I am looking for something along the same lines for the women in the office at his children's school... Are you planning a gift giving post soon- I am sure I will love all your ideas!

Well Sarah, now that the Fall holiday's are all out of the way, I'm ready to get shopping and buying those gifts. However, in terms of doing a gift giving post, while I do plan on continuing with my "Things I Love Today" posts of great finds (that will be more holiday and gift focused), I unfortunately am not planning a big gift giving post. Instead, all the "Things I Love" are and will be categorized under the Good Things category in the side bar. You will see me popping in with great gift ideas from time to time in the coming weeks though that will just be a post unto themselves so just stay tuned.

Okay. Now, your request is actually pretty difficult. A few generic but good ideas are always gift certificates, although to be honest, unless someone specifically requests a gift certificate from a specific store, I really don't give those because it's too impersonal to me. But that's just me. If you remember back to the reaader request about teachers gifts, we had quite a few teachers comment that they really love receiving the gift certificates so I would recommend taking their opinion to heart. But if you don't really know a lot of these people who you need to buy gifts for, such as the doorman, then a gift certificate is a good way to go. You can go the standard route of Starbucks or Target, or you can head over to Spa Finder and do a gift certificate from them or you can also do a nice gift certificate from Restaurant.com, Omaha Steaks (we've received several gift packages and every type of steak they offer and it's always been great quality, we've found), or even gift certificates to the movies. If you do the movie gift card, then you can package them up really cute with some candy and popcorn etc. in clear cellophane bags with loads of pretty ribbon at the top with the gift card tucked inside. Cute, right?! But another great gift is from Nostalgic Candy. At NC you'll find hundreds of retro candy (think wax lips, candy buttons, and bubble gim cigars just to name a few) and great gift packages that will reall take it's recipient for a stroll down memory lane. Also, I don't know if you have an establishment such as Super Suppers where you live, but that would be a GREAT gift card for teachers or secretary. I would really go look into that (that is such fun for a girls night out too, BTW!) but also look into other similar-type companies such as Dream Dinners or The Dinner A'Fare in case Super Suppers isn't available where you live.

If you want to give an actual gift, which, as you know, is my preference, then there are some great online shops that I really reccomend looking into. My latest favorite little online shop is Give Simple. I am actually dying for them to re-order these bags they sold out of but really look around there and I know something will appeal to you. A few more sites to look at : The Silken Thread which I've mentioned before and highly reccomend, In This Very Room, Hand Picked silver, Spoon Sisters, Layla Grace, Morgan & Company, Wrapables, Horchow, and the always reliable Red Envelope. I have also been a fan of Exposures Online for many many years, and they too, offer great creative and unique gift suggestions. Swoozies, an Atlanta based stationery and gift store, also has a few nice selections online (not very comprehensive though), such as these Double bottle Bags that you can have monogrammed and then put 2 nice bottles of wine in (perhaps a red and a white) for your recipient.

I hope a one or two of these sites or suggestions will appeal to you. Like I said, it's so difficult to pinpoint specific ideas when it's for people you don't really know all that well! Always remember that nice personalized stationery coupled together with a really beautiful and unique pen is a gift you can never go wrong with for a male or female as well. I also like the idea of doing custom Design-Her Gals recipe cards for your (female) recipient and giving those in conjunction with a great and fun cookbook. It really tells your recipient you were thinking about them. Good luck and let me know how it goes, and also if you have any more questions.

Reader Requests: Pumpkin Party Help

Okay, Okay. I know I’ve been MIA today. So sue me. Well, maybe don’t sue me per say as I don’t think Mr. Monogram would appreciate that, but whatever. Don’t say I didn’t warn you that October was going to be crazy busy for me! Just take comfort in knowing you are always on my mind. *queue Willie Nelson singing in the background*

So this morning I dropped the mini monograms off at pre-school only to realize I had written the wrong day and time down for an important meeting at the pre-school. Argh. There went an entire hour out of my morning! After that I had to make a mad dash home to check on a few ebay auctions (yeah I’m totally serious about this. I’m one of those last second bidders who have aggravatingly swiped your coveted item in the last 50 seconds of an auction). With the thrill of victory (and someone else’s agony of defeat) securely under my belt, it was time to hop back in the car and make a mad dash out to the ‘burbs to my favorite gift and stationary shop. However, while I was on my way, I stopped at my new favorite little gift shop closer to my home and really got in the stationary invitation buying spirit! I saw so many adorable invitations that I swear it made me want to throw a hunting themed party just for the heck of it. Don’t put it past me; you know it just might happen. So anyway, now I’m on my way out to the ‘burbs and thankfully, I finally found mini monogram #2’s birthday party invitations. Of course they are going to frustrate the dickens out of me printing them, but whatever. As long as they’re cute, who cares?! I also scored an ADORABLE apron there for my sister which my monogrammer now has possession of to monogram for me, then ran and met my friend Robin for lunch. A few things that didn’t get done today are a quick run into Old Navy a stop into Michael’s, and also into Target. But please, who can just “run” into Target and get out? Not this monogram momma, that’s for sure!

Gosh I am really babbling tonight aren't I? And I’m sure it really doesn’t excite you to know what’s been keeping me so wrapped up and busy today. But just know I’ve spotted some fabulous stationary and paper and invitations and I will be sharing those with you shortly. But for now, here’s a reader request to quench your creative and curious thirst.

Sarah says:

Hi Monogram Momma,
I hope you aren't sick of me yet- believe me I have many more things I am dying to ask you about! As I stated in my previous emails I was recently married. My dear husband has two children (7 and 10) the children and I enjoy a wonderful relationship! Now, I am an old pro (!) at grown up cocktail partys and dinners but I am embarking on my first ever kids party! I have invited seven families that we are friends with (children and parents) and my stepchildren have each invited an additional 3-4 classmates for a party on a Saturday afternoon/night before Halloween. I am all set on the adult part- the appetizers, drinks etc but the children are leaving me stumped! Should I set up stations- one to carve pumpkins, another to do a craft, so on and so on? In our guest house we are setting up a haunted house but Monogram Momma I have no idea how to entertain children at a party for three hours! Please help! The party is the 21st of October- I sent out the invitations last week- so cute the Jack O'Lanterns by Sarah LeClere (Fine Stationery) The party is 5-8 PM mix of adults/kids I am mostly having it catered which will cover the adults but am not really sure what the feed the kids! I am not really into just ordering pizza- and am sure you have fabulous ideas! I was going to set our front porch (it is glassed in) up as a pumpkin carving area, the dining room would be the dessert buffet- I just got beautiful serving pieces that I am dying to use! I love love love crafts but am not very experienced with doing them with kids! I am not sure what is age appropriate- the ages of the kids will range from 3-10!

Dear Sarah (btw, my niece's name is Sarah), I hope you didn't think I forgot about you, but I've been so busy! I can't quite remember what I've been busy with but trust me, I've been a lunatic lately (at least that's what my husband's been murmuring anyway). The possible move to the land of Coalminers Daughters has NOT had me in a very pleasant or party planning type of mood, but now that that's been settled (and I seem to have won the battle), I can sit down and get some additional ideas to you. First of all, let me just say, what a great choice you made with the Sarah LeClere. I adore her stationary. If anyone can do elegant and cute in a quirky invitation, it's Sarah. Shall I assume my invitation is being held up in the mail? *sigh*

Food for Kids: Honestly stick to finger foods, which I'm sure you're going to have lots of snacks and app's available anyway. But I would designate an area for the kids food and drinks. Now, if you hop on over to the Family Fun website, you can get a whole long list of great Halloween themed kid friendly party foods here. Don't forget to check out Martha's website and on the Halloween page, scroll down to where it says "Repulsive Recipes." These recipes are very simple and easy to do and fun for the kids to eat as well. If you don't want to make them, then you can always print up a few recipes and see if your caterer will do it. For instance, the mummy fingers which are really just pigs in a blanket, are a big crown pleaser for kids. If you label the fun finger foods with their creepy names, then that will be fun for the kids as well. And try to remember that you can always make a dip more fun by putting a creepy looking hand from the party supply store coming out of or into the bowl of dip, or maybe a attach a few plastic spiders to the outside of the silver bowl, so you've still got your beautiful serving pieces, but you're making them more festive for Halloween. And one more tip to think about is if you opt to do a cheese ball of some sort, that can easilly be turned into the shape of a pumpkin. You can see here what sister #2 did for mini #2's birthday party last year as an example. Cut the stem off of a piece of brocoli, turn it upside down and it instantly becomes the stem of the pumpkin.

Pumpkin Decorating/Carving: Actual carving will be difficult for the younger ones, so in addition to pumpkin carving, i would buy small pumpkins and some pumpkin painting kits so some of the kids can paint their pumpkins instead of carving. You might even want to do a glitter station too, since glitter pumpkins seem to be all the rage. I would still keep this all in the same area as the carving, but it will just give the little ones a chance to decorate as well! I know that last year they had a pumpkin painting kit at Walmart (yes, the dreaded Walmart that you all know I *love* so much) that included a real pumpkin, a paint kit, brushes, and even a few stencils, in an octogonal box. Each little box had a nice little handle and was made so the pumpkin could rest perfectly on top for drying. It was perfect! They may also have those at Sam's Club, I'm not sure, and I haven't looked for them this year, but they were fabulous last year and the kids really had a ball with it.

Crafts: Don't sweat it! Trust me, I know that arranging crafts and activities for young children when you're not used to it can be slightly intimidating. But even if you don't fancy yourself a crafty person, hop on over to Oriental Trading Company and they sell simple and fun Fall and Halloween crafts and everything you could possible need to do the crafts, in little kits. Theire prices are SO INEXPENSIVE and it is the easiest one stop shop for kids crafting projects. I like to keep a few different things around the house for the kids on days (such as today) when we don't quite make it out of the house. Anyway, here is the Halloween page and on the left-hand side, there is a link for Halloween crafts. One thing I love is the Halloween Photo Magnet Craft. It's easy enough for small kids to just glue the pieces on the frame and will require very little parental assistance. I mean we don't want to be dragging the parents away from all the adult fun to be crafting with the kids all night, right? I always try to take pictures of each child at a party so I can send it with my thank you note, so if they did this craft, you can include a photo for the frame to each parent. Alternately, you can take cute digital pictures throughout the earlier part of the evening, maybe of each family or couple or child doing activities and enjoying themselves at the party, and assign a teenager to print them up on photo paper so the guests can take them home with them from the party, already in the frame. But that is just one craft example. You will find an endless array of ideas over at OTC so I would recommend buying a few different types to give kids different options. As far as actually DOING the crafts, you can set up different craft stations or 1 large crafting area. I like the idea of having a designated crafting area, but a table for each different craft. That way the different parts and pieces won't get all jumbled together for the kids. If you don't have enough tables and chairs, always remember hay bales are the perfect seating this time of year! Cover them with some rustic looking burlap (so your guests aren't walking around with hay on their rear ends..although that would make for some good pictures though!) and arrange them in different seating arrangments for people to casually sit and converse and the kids to do crafts as well. In terms of what is an age appropriate craft, I would recommend this: Age 3-5 stick with gluing and simple coloring. ages 6-10 you can do some more complicated crafts that involve beading and simple instructions, and of course, gluing and painting too. Also, I will tell you the little ones always love stickers so that is something else to keep in mind. Oh, and don't forget to pick up enough glue from Oriental Trading Co as well before you place your craft order!

Drinks: I know you didn't ask me about this, but you know me, I'm going to make a few suggestions anyway. If you're planning on having a tended bar, then that's ideal. If not, and you're keeping this on the more casual catered side of things, then I love to use pumpkins as coolers to hold drinks this time of year. Yep, that's right! PUMPKINS AS A COOLER! I know, it's sheer genious; one of my true Martha moments. I will touch more on this in a post later on in the week, but you can buy smaller pumpkins and carve them out, fill them with ice and drinks (the kids especially think this is really fun), or buy a few of the hundred pounders as I have, make a large hole in the top and clean it all out and fill it with drinks. Here's a little example from mini #2's birthday party last October. Of course, ignore the little snack cups in front, but you can see that I used two medium to large sized pumpkins and held the kids drinks in them on the buffet table. If you set up a nice multi-level area of hay bales, then make a nice area and gathering place of these pumpkins filled with ice and drinks, it's very festive and fall looking. Since it's getting dark earlier now too, I might even stake a few oil lanterns in the ground (tall ones, not short, because of the kids. Safety first you know!) to keep it well lit also. One more idea to keep in mind if you're enteratining outside and this would be great out by your guest house, is to pick up one or two new aluminum wheel-barrows. Yes! Wheel-barrows! Fill them with ice and keep them stocked with drinks. You can even have large orange and yellow bows made from your local craft store and tie them on each handle, and sprinkle some hay loosely around the base. I know this is a lot of focus on drinks, but that's just my own pet peeve as I like to make sure there is more than enough food and drink for everyone. Besides, you know I just do not like an insulated cooler for entertaining so that means sometimes you just have to get creative!

Now, one last idea I'm going to throw out to you. You mentioned a haunted house in the pool house. That is a great idea! I love this, but remember the little ones probably won't enjoy having a scary monster jump out at them in the dark, nor will their parents at 3Am when little Johnny waskes up screaming from nightmares in a fit of terror. So as an alternative you can have a large haystack (can you tell I get a little obsessed with hay this time of year?) and buy lots of little fun trinkets and toys and bouncy balls and stickers, etc... from oriental trading as well. Have them well hidden in the haystack so the kids really have to hunt and dive for them. Also pick up some around the neck flashlights for the kids and before the "needle in the haystack" competition, equip each child with their around the neck flashlight and a bag to hold all their fun finds. You can do this for the older kids as well, but I would do lots of layers of really well hidden stuff for them. Let the little kids go first and just let a buzzer go off when their time is up. Then let the bigger kids go have their turn at the fun next! Oh, one important note here is to wait until it's about dark to do this so they can use their little flashlights to find their treats!

Now, like I said, I'm anxiously awaiting my invite or at the very least, some great photos!